My Last First Day | My Fears...

About two weeks ago, the semester started up again. I have a crazy schedule, I either have one class in the morning for an hour and 15 mins, in the evening for two and a half hours, or in the afternoon for three hours and 40 mins. It's only four classes but I feel like they're going to drive me insane. My family is telling me to chill out and that everything's going to be ok, and it might be, but they also don't have presentations to do, projects to create, events to attend, planning an event and write a semi-huge research paper by the end of the semester.

This also doesn't count the homework/reading in between. I should be used to it but it's my last semester and I kind of just want to relax, ya know? I've been in school since I was four years old, similar to other people around my age and I've had jobs from time to time, have done internships to gain experience (paid and non-paid), and I'm just tired. But even though I'm complaining now, I'm really scared of what's to come next...finding a job after graduation.

My family members have been trying to reassure me for months that I'll find a job and things will be ok...yea I've heard it before, but that doesn't help my anxious body worry about the future. I'm not the only one graduating and I'm definitely not the only one looking for a job. A lot of my friends on social media are either complaining about the job that they have, or wanting to find a second job to make ends meet. Some of them don't have jobs in what they majored in when they went to college, some of them had to drop out because they needed the money and couldn't afford to continue. And some of them are just getting back into school after years of saving up because they want a better job. So shouldn't I be worried if I'm going for the same positions that hundreds of others, who are just like me, that are applying too?

Jobs want experience, but when you're a young adult fresh out of college, even the little experience I have from my internships doesn't seem to be enough. And I know that there are entry-level positions but what I have access to apply to are either in a different state or I don't "qualify". I know I have to start somewhere, but when you have student loans that are due within 6 months after graduation, all I can think of is an imaginary clock ticking down the time until the first payment is due. *sigh*

But I guess there's always graduation to look forward to. . .

Nicole Eggleston